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Tuesday, 23 July 2013

My Top 10 Guilty Pleasures in Movies

After watching Lindsay Ellis' AKA Nostalgia Chick's Top List.  I got inspired by her bravery and decided to do a top 10 list of guilty pleasures.  However since I like all mediums and not just Movies like her list I decide to take this to the next level.  I will post one top list for each medium.  Starting with Movies.

Now to me a guilty pleasure isn't just a movie most people hate but I like, but also movies you guys may not have heard of.  So I shall provide poster pictures of each movie so that when you go to your local video store you can go "Hey S.T. likes this, I should see what the fuss is about."  I kid of course I mainly do this because I want to share my likes with all of you.

10. Dragonball Evolution.

Now that I taken the time to make sure Chu-ey and Squirty are still guarding my house from lynch mobs let me explain.  As said before in my Straight Up Review, I hate the Buu Saga blah blah blah.  While I was slowly recovering from what I call Anime Blue Screen Of Death, I heard news that they were making a Dragon Ball Movie.  I was excited it was like my inner fanboy was unleashed.  Needless to say what I watched was not what I expected, but I liked it anyway.  Personally I don't see why people complain about it. "Goku's not Asian." He's an alien I think Nationality was thrown out the window on that one.  "Goku's in Highschool." It takes place in the modern future rather than simply advanced past. It's gonna be a little hard to raise a boy in the woods when part of those woods are torn down to make way for new cities. "Piccolo didn't kill Grandpa Gohan."  Hey that was a good change even if the other reasons were justified and it ain't the first time a villain was promoted to Murderer of Hero's parents *Cough* Tim Burton's Batman *Cough*.
 All and all I like this movie and let's face it when they do make a newer one it's gonna suck worse and people are gonna say that this one was better by comparison.  Just like Street Fighter. And hey at least it wasn't Michael Bay that directed.....wait come to think about it as stupid as that sounds that would be perfect for Bay.  I mean the Anime alone has it's fair share of fanservice and shit blowing up. Then again so does Ninja Turtles and apparently he is gonna make it worse!!!!

9.  Felix The Cat

Now I would like to take the time to thank NC for reviewing this because it helped reignite my love of this character.   When I was a kid I used to watch an old show called Twisted Tales of Felix The Cat, it was very nonsensical even for my standards of the time.  However my major love of the character came from an old Cartoon Serial I had on my 6 Hour Cartoon VHS.  It was called "The Goose That Laid The Golden Age.  In which Felix and Goldie, the titular goose decide to use Goldie's talents to help the poor.  When an evil pirate named Captain Kidd snatches Goldie, Felix jumps into action to save his friend.  This Cartoon specifically was very dark and I often wonder to this day how those writers got away with it.  It had it's fair share of comedic moments, but much of it looked like a realistic swashbuckling action movie.  And that was just one Cartoon serial.  This Movie on the other hand at least to me, was an extension of that cartoon I loved so dearly as a child.  In it Felix travels to the land of Oriana to rescue a princess from her evil Uncle, the Duke of Zill.  The movie itself was a nonsensical mess, but I loved every minute of it and let's face it, I am a sucker for the 80s.

8. The Wraith

Now this movie barely exist to the world if not for 5 names.  The first one more well known than the other 3.. And let's just say back then he was also winning.  That's right folks, this was one of Charlie Sheen's earlier lesser known films. The others were Clint Howard (Whom you know in every Ron Howard movie ever made.), Sherilyn Fenn (Of Twin Peaks fame)  Randy Quaid (Yes the drunk pilot from Independence Day) And Nick Cassevettes whom you might not know acting wise; but you may know him as the director of the Notebook.  Suffice to say he plays the main villain of this movie.  I found this out by accident when I was watching a tape that had two other movies on it.  One was Jason Lives and the other was Little Shop Of Horrors.  Since then there were lot's of things.  The movie itself revolves around a mysterious man named Jake Kesey (Sheen) who came to Arizona to court local Waitress Keri Johnson (Fenn) who just lost a boyfriend to murder and is now forced into a relationship with Packard Walsh (Cassevettes) leader of a gang of "Road Pirates." Who challenge their victims to dangerous drag races and use their car as collateral.  The entire town lives in fear of the gang and the Sheriff Loomis (Quaid) without evidence.  As all this is going on a mysterious figure in a black car shows up to challenge the gang, killing them one by one with his supernatural technologically advanced Car.  Whoever he is he's "Weird and Pissed off."   I love this movie due to it's 80s camp and near anime style story telling and I was surprised to find out who The Wraith really was at the time.  I was even more surprised that Cassevette's whom directed one of my most hated movies the Notebook.  Played a very intelligent, cold and psychotic villain in Packard Walsh.  It just goes to show you never know much about people. Plus it's got the best mix of 80s mix music from new wave to heavy metal.  What more can anyone ask? And that Car look up the words Turbo Interceptor and you'll see what I am talking about.

7. The Gladiator.

Now this movie is essentially what the Wraith would be like if A. It was more realistic and B. There two versions, both good and evil.

It Centers around Rick Benton a mechanic who lost his brother surviving a brush with a serial killer who uses a car with advanced illegal technology to kill people.   Benton uses his skills to convert his pick up truck to be more stronger, faster and as advanced as the car that killed his brother and becomes a vigilante called the Gladiator.   As he searches for the driver that killed his brother he decides to rid the streets of reckless drivers.  However as his quest for revenge intensifies the police think he'll go to far and try to stop him.  I liked this movie solely because it was not bad for a TV movie.  It showed the Pros and Cons of Revenge Vigilantism and unlike Wraith it actually showed a realist approach to turning a car into a dangerous street weapon.  You could very well call it Death Wish with Cars.

6. Super Mario Bros.

Personally I don't see what all the hate is all about. I mean the story of Mario at the time of this movie was released while great was pretty generic.  Mario rescues princess from evil enemies.  It wasn't until Mario 64 came out that they did an extended one in which Power Stars were involved and many worlds have problems that only the titular plumbers were the only ones that can solve it.  Before that came into fruition, this movie and the Cartoon Series were the only mediums that have put an actual storyline.  Suffice to say much of the games that came out after this movie had elements of the movie put in them.  The paintings that lead to other worlds in 64 was taken from the scene where the Bros. enter Dinohattan for the first time.  Hell Toad's Turnpike in Mario Kart looks like Dinohattan itself only cleaner.  This was the first video game movie I ever watched and I loved every minute of it.

5.  Guyver

Don't be fooled by the poster Mark Hamil does not play the titular Bio Booster fighter. This movie was a mess, an overhyped R rated Power Ranger flick and an insult to the Manga.  Say what you will about DBE but this was the worse. The suit was cheap rubber, the monsters were inaccurate in every way and they managed to take down Mark Hamill, Jeffery Combs, Jimmie Walker and David Gale a whole peg.  In fact the sequel was a lot better because it had improved storyline, costume effects and even replaced that no named guy with David Hayter.  That's right folks, Solid Snake is The Guyver.  Now you're probably wondering "If you hate this movie so much why is it a guilty pleasure."  I liked it when I was a kid, and now a days I catch it on TV and poke fun at how delightfully stupid it is.  I mean they had the Jaws theme playing while Guyver cut his way out of the stomach of one of his enemies.  This was so stupid it's awesome and I loved every minute of it.

4. Space Jam

This movie was bad but I liked it for one simple reason.  If you read my first Straight Up Review of Teen Titans Go, (Which I will not put on this list because it's not a guilty pleasure.)  you'll know I talked about a concept known as, characters on down time.  This is where it started people.  Nevermind the dull acting of Michael Jordon, or the out of character way the Tunes talked when not doing their classic shorts.....or the bunny boobies.  This showed us that offscreen the Looney Tunes are no different than the average every day actors.  They have lives outside the show and troubles every other actor is.  The only difference is that as Daffy Duck pointed out, they get screwed over on merchandise. Joking aside this movie came up with my favorite media concept and I couldn't thank it enough for it even if it did ruin the fandom that existed since the 30s.

3. The Little Shop Of Horrors

When people here this name they instantly think "The musical with Rick Moranis."  and I thought of that too, but that wasn't until I seen this.  This was what started it all the 1960 B movie Horror Comedy by B Movie Legend Roger Corman.  While many consider the musical superior, I find this better, not just because it's original but it had better characters.  For example many times Seymour killed someone in this version, he did it by accident in the most hilarious ways imaginable which further shows how bad his luck is.  It also showed a character I liked that I found to my disappointment, was never seen in the musical, Burson Fouch.  To those that don't know, Fouch was a regular customer at Mushnik's flowershop.  What makes him funny, is that he buys flowers to eat them.  When I saw that I would think Audery 2 (Audrey Jr.  in this movie.) Would be his archenemy.  Think about it, Man-eating Plant Vs Plant-eating Man.   That would have been an epic battle.  Not only that, but it was Fouch that set the plot forward.  He stated that the best flower shops keep strange and unusual plants on display which attract more customers and make more money.  Last but not least a reason to like this movie we can all agree on.  It was one of Jack Nicholson's early roles, but I won't tell you who he plays.  You'll have to find that one out. 

2. Home Alone 2: Lost In New York

Now I have no idea why this one was hated so much too.  Yes the violence is both horrifying and cartoonishly unrealistic, but it's got better cons than pros.   First off it's the only Sequel you'll ever see Culkin, in unless he ends up playing a dad in the next one.  It also has something you rarely see work in sequels: Escalation.  In the original he was simply defending his home from intruders.  In this one we see a more selfless side of Kevin McCallister is lost and alone in another city with nothing but his Wits and his dad's credit card to guide him.  He finds out that his enemies The Wet/Sticky Bandits are planning to steal money from a charity.  To make matters worse, the burglars are somewhat wise to his traps from the first movie but as Kevin says "Don't you know a kid always wins against 2 idiots?".  But my main reason for liking this movie is that it contains one of my personal favorite songs "Christmas Star." By John Williams.  Everytime I hear this song I get teary ey---- I mean some kind of dust causes my eyes to water.  Fuck it it's my 94th post no bullshit. I'm a guy and I cry at emotional moments in movies, happy now!? But ranting aside this movie was one of my greatest movies to watch as a child and it's a hell of a lot better than the sequels they got now.

1.  Small Soldiers

This is a guilty pleasure I haven't seen for a long time.   I liked it in the theater, I liked it on VHS.   Yet as I talk about this I hear that I am only part of half the majority of this movie base.  People think that it's cliched with Satire and War Movie Parodies and while that is true there is some charm to it.   The movie revolves around a Toy Company being taken over by GlobalTech a once Cold War era based weapons company that uses their money, power and Technology to try to improve the lives of civilian consumers.  In this case they help produce two lines of soldier toys. The first is the Commando Elite, a group of GI Joe like figures that set out to defend America from the other Group The Gorgonites.  These toys however are no ordinary action figures, but can move, talk and learn like regular humans thank's to Globaltech's experimental chip the X-1000.  However that is not all. Local Juvenile Delinquent Alan Abernathy purchases the two sets in order to help his father make money on his failing toystore.  Said soldiers activate and wage war against one and other and humans are caught in the middle of it. Not all is what it seems though as the Gorgonites are really peaceful monsters that simply want to find their home while the Elite want to use any means necessary to wipe them out along with anyone that gets in their way.   I was stoked when I first watched this movie and even more excited now when I found out that it was Joe Dante that created it.  Ya it's cliched and many people would rather watch something better.  It also gets bonus points for being one of the few films in the world to get permission from Led Zepplin to feature their music in it. Now that is a hell of an accomplishment.

Now normally this would be the part where I, like many reviewers would apologize for putting you through a nightmare of things you probably hate.  But let me go on record and  Better yet, Hell No.  This may sound hypocritical, since I have on occasion have hated other guilty pleasures and spoke proudly of how much I hate them, but here's the thing: There are gonna be things I like and things I hate.  There are gonna be things I like that some people would hate and there would be things I hate that someone would like.  More power to us either way, but it doesn't mean I am gonna disrespect others for hating what I like and liking what I hate.  We may get into arguments on it and even go as far as cussing each other out and as low as calling each other names when we can't think of things to win either side of the argument.  If someone even likes something as god awful as Twilight I am gonna make my argument known but it doesn't mean I hate the person for liking it.  I just wonder why someone would like that piece of shit.  The same Twihard fan probably wonders the same about me when I mention Stephen King or Bram Stoker.   The point though is that without our guilty pleasures, we wouldn't have that one of many things that makes us as human beings so unique.

As usual debate, argue and let me know what I missed.  Stay Tuned For More. 

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