Esults by STFilmmaker and Co.

Something I whipped up, inspired by League of Super Critics.  I figured what better way to introduce my characters by insulting people. Hehe.  You can use at your own leisure and risk and if you want to request some I'll be happy to so long as they are appropriate ones.  Enjoy.

Higurashi Poem

Something I did for kicks to tide you guys while I get to work in restoring my shows.
Images from: Whentheycry.wikia.com
Music by Teknoaxe
Specifically: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iO0J0eP7Jyk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CylDcBfb4zY
Enjoy

The Matrix

Thought I'd update on an old Text version of my site.
Images from: Wikipedia.org Matrix.wikia.org nationalgeorgraphic.com and nydailynews.com
Sounds from: Freesfx.co.uk soundbible.com soundfxnow.com
Music from Teknoaxe
Specifically:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6oOaEDXy3M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CylDcBfb4zY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfhkBI3eTU4

S.T. Halloween Tag

Just a little something I threw in for kicks.  I'm not sure if I was the only person to start something like this, but I thought I'd do something fun for the upcoming halloween. You're all welcome to start your own tags of this caliber.

It's based off an old game I used to participate in school where one starts a story then stops, then let's someone else continue where they left on and so fourth and so on.

Since I did this particular one first there are nine more to go.

Top 10 Crappy Pick Up Lines of George Lucas and Stephen Spielberg

Well with Jurassic Park IV and Disney's Star Wars being in development hell I might as well crack a few jokes at the expense of their respective Filmmakers Steven Spielberg and George Lucas.  While I respect the hell out of them.  I also dislike much of their film choices in the dreaded late 90s early 2000s period as at the time they both violated the sacred pact of a good filmmaker "If it ain't Broke. Don't fix it."  So I warn you so called "pure" fans that much of what I say may insult them.  You can flame me all you want, but don't ever say I show disrespect.  Anywho the reason for this specific list is because I often noticed in both their films, much of their romance scenes often sound like the heroes are trying to pick up their respective love interests like they were at a bar.  The famous example being Han and Leia's Dialogue In Empire Strikes Back, when he assumed she didn't want him to leave because of her feelings for him.

This list goes like so.  10 lines, 5 for each filmmaker.  These are meant to be crappy, but if you get a good laugh from them more power to you.  Let's Start With Lucas.

10. I always shoot first.
9. I got away with duck tits, who knows what I can do with you.
8. Wanna see my lightsaber?
7. The hornyness is strong with this one.
6. If you strike me down I shall become more powerful than you can ever imagine.


Now Spielberg

5. You're gonna need a bigger bed.
4. Do I have a Walkie Talkie in my pocket or am I just happy?
3. To me X always marks the spot.
2. You know that boulder chasing Indy? Look down.
1. How about I have a close encounter with all three of you.


In the comments below I encourage all who read this to come up with lines that work with your favorite filmmakers.  I am actually curious to what you come up with.

As usual, debate, argue and let me know what I missed.  Stay Tuned For More.

Bonus for both of them:

For Lucas: I'm ashamed of the Holiday Special, but I'm not ashamed of you.
For Spielberg: Schindler's not the only one with a list. Look at my black book.

Big T 2000 Aftermath

Exactly what it says on the Tin.

Tribute To BigT2000

As many who read this know I am a big fan of Legend Of Zelda.   What people don't know is that it includes the abridged series' as well.  One of my personal favorites is Link Hyrule Assassin.  Whom just recently just ended the Termina Season.  This short comic panel was inspired by a particular scene which you'll have to see for your self in the link below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCxnWwRkvgc

Big T if you are reading this, I thought this moment would be so Demon Link. 

Pun Clock

Just a thing I got inspired to do by Dawn of Atop The Fourth Wall Live. Enjoy.

The Adventures of ST Filmmaker #4

 

Well I thought it was time to introduce a new foe to ST and see how he takes it. Not only that but let's show further adventures of Chu-ey ST's lovable abomination.  Also despite me calling it a Pikachu twice now I must elaborate.  It is not a Pikachu, it is simply a Chu-ey.  End of story good bye the end. 

The adventures of Professor Maple (aka S.T. Filmmaker #3)

It's been a while since I made another crappy comic, not from lack of trying, but until the Pokemon article I had a bad case of writers block.  So I decided to do a bit of mad science.  In case you are wondering where I got the name Professor Maple. It's a play on Professor Oak, both of which are named after trees, and I picked Maple because I am Canadian and I thought it would be funny to do a guy that is the opposite of Oak.  Rather than studying Pokemon he decides to go nuts and make one.

If Doctor Who was American

I thought I would take a short break from superhero month to do something a little different. A sort of what if.   As I mentioned before I believed in the possibility of a multiverse. Where every possibility could happen for better and for worse. A debate I once had with someone on Youtube a while back sort of inspired me of one hypothetical one.  If Doctor Who was invented by American TV  instead of BBC.  Now before I go into the details here's how it would go down.  Same, show, same plotlines both the good and bad. But more or less the show taking place in the US and with North American Actors.  I am not doing this with intention to piss anyone who's a fan of the series.  Hell I only watched a few, the rest I just looked up and I love the concepts.  But I often wonder what would happen if they did things differently like that time Two Episodes of the original 60s Show were Remade as movies Starring Peter Cushing.  In this case out of mostly personal opinion I am gonna pick North American actors from each time period that would fit the roles.

For the First Doctor it would be James Coburn.  He has starred in many movies from light hearted action to straight out parodies most famously Our Man Flint, who parodies the James Bond Series before Austin Powers made it cool.  So he knows how to go from comic to comically serious like the original first Doctor.

The Second Doctor would be Travolta.  Before he became a serious actor he was mostly played the type of lighthearted impish characters even movies that required him to be the tough guys.  Plus who better to play a Timelord than a guy that actually believes aliens helped shape this earth.

The Third Doctor would be Marlon Brando.  For starters he has had experience playing an alien scientist before. Other times he's often played the Suave adventurous type. The kind you know is badass even if he does nothing throughout the entire film.  These Traits were essential to the Third Doctor.

The Fourth would be Tom Hanks.  While Hanks has been known for a lot of roles some of which earned him his share of the Oscars.  Many people don't know was that when he is not being a serious character he is often quirky and wild almost like a child.  The same kind of character traits that Tom Baker's Fourth Doctor caused him to last longer than the other Doctors before and after him.

The Fifth would be Jeff Bridges.  Much like Peter Davidson, Bridges has been well known to be one of the nicest people on and off screen.  In many of his movies (One's where he's the protagonist anyway.)  he often has tried to find ways to solve a problem without resorting to violence, however unlike the original Fifth, some of them actually work out quite well.

The Sixth would be George C Scott.  Both Colin Baker and George C. Scott have been known to play Manic Egotistical Arrogant characters.  In George's case, General Patton, Ebenezer Scrooge and even a man who thought he was Sherlock Holmes.  That persona would have been perfect for him and let's face it. You can just picture General Patton in Baker's place trying to strangle Peri.

Peter Falk would be the seventh.  The Seventh Doctor has been portrayed as Bumbling on the outside, but on the inside a bit of a chess master, knowing how to get through almost any situation with just his brain.  Kinda like a certain NBC mystery movie star we know and love.  Give Columbo a TARDIS and a question Mark umbrella and you got the whole package.

T

The Eighth Doctor has been described as a person who encourages others to seize life instead of withdrawing from it.   Robin Williams is that type to do so and the fact that like Brando before him he's played an alien in the past cements it. Plus it has been implied that The Eighth was responsible for destroying both sides of the Time War.  When I think of someone with this persona capable of such destruction of that magnitude I think Robin Williams.  I don't know why but I can totally see him destroying Daleks and Time Lords in the near future.

Now here's where it gets difficult. The Modern day 3.

The Ninth Doctor had been described as all the heartbreak in his life finally taking toll on him.  Losing his Companions, losing his race, almost even losing his mind when he comes across his old enemies the Dalek's.  I could think of no one else better to be his American equivalent than. Robert Downey Jr.  Before we knew him as one of the greatest Superheroes in the world, he almost had little to no career.  Many things in his life had beaten him down almost to the point where he would have gone insane with depression.  However despite all that he was able to rise above it get better and even become loved once again.  The same reaction the audience got when Chris Eccelston helped bring back a series long thought to be dead.  If there was an American Doctor Who RDJ would be the 9th.

The Tenth has often been said to Teeter Totter between being lighthearted and quirky as well as vengfull and unforgiving.  That is why I think Doug Walker would be him.  When he is himself he is often a nice person, often being too apologetic whenever he makes a mistake.  However when he becomes Nostalgia Critic he shows off his dark side in a way you would never expect if you only met Doug first.

Last but not least Eleventh.  This man ranges from Brash to eccentric as well as a fashion sense which would cause any normal sane man to thing WTF?  That is why Johnny Depp would be the 11th Doctor.  He has been known to play odd ball characters before, some of which with weirder tastes in fashion.  Yet despite all that, much like the Doctor he is well loved by all.  Heck he would also make a good BBC Doctor since he is one of the few Ameican actors in the world that can fake a British accent successfully. Plus much to his frustration he has been known to keep a youthful appearance despite being almost 50 now. If he isn't a time lord than what the hell is he?

So there you have it 11 American Actors that I think would make good Doctors if Doctor Who was created in America instead.   As usual debate, argue, and let me know what I missed. Stay Tuned For More.

Runners Up: I was Originally gonna put Fred Rogers on the 5th Doctor Spot, but while he does fit the personality I felt since 5 was the youngest at the time I would pick a nice guy that would be the youngest at the time the 5th Doctor started out. 

Dead Franchises

While I was searching for more Superheroes to defictionalize, I came across a lot of things they have in common along with other mediums: Their Franchises die out.  Not just comics, but TV movies and what not. So while I am searching I thought I would entertain you the readers with a little humorous game you all can participate in order to pay tribute to said franchises. 


The game is simple I have a template of a head stone.

What you do is you take it, mark it and post it on your own site and send me the link through the comments section like so.....

This one is my contribution..

Now it can be any type of cause.  Be it a show cancelling, it just not being cool anymore, or something still ongoing but to you fans is still pretty dead and as shown above it can be any language even fictional ones like Klingon.

Enjoy, have fun and let me know what I missed.  Stay tuned for more.

FAQ

I just want to take time off to thank you guys for reading my blog.  I never thought I would get as far as 10 but 50, holy sh**.  I figure for my 51st post I might as well do an FAQ. I am gonna take questions that I assume you'd probably ask and answer them as plainly as possible.

1. What inspired you to do this?

Believe it or not it was actually a lot of things.  First was my ambition to become a filmmaker, I figured if I wanted to make movies one day I would have to see if I could make some of the most impossible things, possible in theory.  The second was my mother, we had a bit of a debate years ago about the nature of the fictional world. She believed it wasn't possible save for a few things and I was actually determined to prove otherwise.  The third is something you guys are not gonna believe.  I have a very strong empathy for fictional characters, it's bizarre but I react the same way to them as if they are standing next to me. If someone was good and gets hurt, I feel just as hurt for them. The best way would be Jaden Yuki in the Yu-gi-oh GX Series.  He had the uncanny ability to see "Spirits" of his cards and would react badly to them getting hurt than he would on just losing the game.  Though there have been hints that the cards were based off real monsters with in the show, but as far as everyone in the Yu-gi-oh universe was concerned that was only a myth.  But in a way I share that same empathy of sorts. Last but not least I wanted to be an internet reviewer like the guys at channel awesome. However like others before me I wanted to do something unique, something that would make me stand out.  So I did what most reviewers didn't, I try to find ways to make the mediums they review fit in a real life setting.

2. Who were your influences?

Well I was heavily influenced by Channel Awesome.  Nostalgia Critic and Linkara especially. However other influences included James Rolfe aka Angry Video Game Nerd,  Mathew Patrick aka Game Theory since his show is similar to what I am doing only he is more focused on defictionalizing video games, whilst I decide to tackle all mediums.

3. What is defictionalization?

Defictionalization is, where you take a concept from a fictional medium and you try to see if it exists in real life.  The word was coined from TV Tropes, but the concept has been around since the 1970s when the movie Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory hit theatres.  Though I'll explain why when I get to it.  However I'll give you a hint, it involves product placement.

4.  What is your favorite fictional medium?

Well that's a tough one because I like em all, but if I had to pick a personal favorite, it would be Movies, Games and Anime. Mainly because I grew up watching those mostly.

5. How does Folklore fit into the real world category?

Well I always believed that Folklore, Myths, and other Urban Legends have some grain of truth in them. I mean it's not like you can pull thousands of years of stories out of thin air, you need to witness some aspect of it.  The way I see it the formula for Folklore goes like so:  It starts out as a guy witnessing something incredible, he tells his friends, who tells their friends and so on. However in the process the story gets jumbled up and it then becomes a rumor.  This in turn becomes a story.  Because it's such a good story, it gets passed down from generation to generation until one day someone, a child perhaps asks "Is this for real?" Which sparks an argument between the people who heard the story.  This turns the story into a Myth because the term Myth literally means "It could be true."  Because that Myth becomes synonymous with the country or town it takes place in, it becomes Folklore.  Now look at fictional mediums today, we know most of them, like Superheroes and Monsters like Freddy and Jason, are not real.  However in 1000 years I would predict that they too will go through the Folklore formula, people would talk about these beings as if they existed at one point.  Criminals would scare each others with stories of the Batman.  Anti-Drug and Abstinence groups would scare developing teens with Jason Voorhees stories.  The possibilities are endless.

6. If you are neutral in the matters of faith why do you express your beliefs?
There is a fine line between being neutral and expression.  My beliefs while I consider facts only to myself, I treat like an opinion.  I can express my opinion so long as I don't try to shove it down your throats. In other words I only express my beliefs because of my freedom to do so rather than contradicting others in terms of fact. However when it comes to other faiths I do not say anything about them unless I did my research on them first. That being said I remain neutral.

7.  You seem to like mentioning Channel Awesome a lot why?
Well aside from being an influence in my life, it's actually helped me through rough patches. Their style of comedy and entertainment  has helped me get through those patches and I thank them for it. In return a direct insult to them is an insult to me too. There's a fine line between debating with them on matters and just simply calling them assholes only because you don't like their show.  If you don't like it don't watch.

8.  Why do you do web comics and jokes between articles?
Well I wanted to do a storyline between them much like Linkara does, but at the time I didn't want to do videos.  As for the jokes I was born on April Fools, if I wasn't a funny person I'd shame fellow April Fools.

9. Will you do Articles on fictional mediums you don't like?
Eventually.  Just because I don't like them doesn't mean there aren't some truth to them.  However I will not, ever under any circumstances do Twilight.  Hell I would take my chances with My Little Pony and I am not even a Brony. Hey that rhymed. However the main reason I am starting with the mediums I like is because I know them better than the ones I don't like.

10. Why won't you defictionalize Twilight?
 Ok I'll say it.  Twilight is the worst thing to happen to fiction.  First it takes Vampires, a concept that I have enjoyed from Dracula to Van Helsing and smashes it to bits.  Turning them from badass creatures of the night to sparkling, whiny wussies whose only concept true to the lore is drinking blood.  Second, take all the Vampire stuff out of the equation and you got the worst romance story in the world. It clearly let's women know that it's ok to have a boyfriend that controls every aspect of their lives and that they are nothing without him. While at the same time the one that does truly love her will never have her, because she has a warped view at what a true man is.  Take the entire supernatural aspect out of it, and its a Steve Wilkos special with a downer ending. I could totally see Steve tear Edward a new one. Third, unlike other vampire fictions where the vampire thing is only a minor inconvenience unless brought up then in that case they deal with it. This however brings it up every single damn time like Meyer was under the impression her readers are idiots. She may as well be in the movie with a picket sign saying "Oh did I mention he's a Vampire?"   Last but not least, they took the concept of the word Twilight and made it all about that series.  Everywhere I go whenever I mention the word they instantly think that series.  When I think Twilight I think the go between light and darkness, I think of one of the greatest Zelda games in the world. I even think of one of the greatest anthology series that ever graced television.  I do not think of this crap. However there is one thing I did like that Meyer didn't even bother with. Charlie Swann, Bella's dad.  Whenever there is a mysterious attack he calls the Cullens up first, when Bella mentions Edward he says something along the lines of "Isn't he a little old for you?" And the first thing he grabs nonchalantly is his shotgun when he answers the door.  It was almost like he knew the Cullens were vampires. Did Meyer develop this any further? No.  And let's talk about Meyer shall we?  Stephen King said when it comes to writing, write what you know.  If all Stephenie Meyer knows is that in order to succeed in life as girl is to have a boyfriend, that controls every aspect of your life, then what does that say about her own life?  Now I am only just guessing, but I believe that she got out of a bad relationship and rather than admit the guy in it was in the wrong she decides to immortalize him in story.  I am with Freud on this. If that is what she knew then she has some series F***ING problems. Get help. You can afford it now.

11. What do you hope to gain from defictionalization?
I hope to gain more open minds on the subject and I hope one day to inspire others to actually prove what I put up.

12.  If that's the case why put disclaimers?

I only advise not for them to try stuff like this at home because I know that not all my readers have any expertise on the stuff and could either get hurt and arrested. That being said I don't want to be blamed for it.  There's inspiration and there is being stupid. Don't be the latter.  If a person is truly qualified to do such an action then by all means do it.

13.  Who do you try to appeal to?
This blog is not only meant to appeal to movie geeks like me, but also scientists, historians and other experts on the matters that these mediums use.  I really hope that one of these experts would talk about this or at least try to contradict me.

14. How did you get the Wii Zapper and Identity Disc to work in your comics?
Obviously it's not real, however my weapons are Defiction incarnate, they represent every aspect of defictionlization I write on this blog. As for how, you figure it out.

15.  What do you personally hope to defiction?
That Zapper,  I myself am trying to figure out how to work that.  If I can't defictionalize my own work then there isn't point of dificitionalizing others. Then again to defiction my own I have to defiction others.

16.  What are your beliefs?
Well as mentioned in my articles I am an Agnostic Pagan,  however my beliefs stretch farther than just that.  My main belief is the concept of the Mutliverse and it's branch fictional realism.   For those who don't know the multiverse concept was a theory that there is more than one universe.  My belief in it stems from the fact that every fictional medium, from The Dark Tower series in books, to Atop The Fourth Wall's Warrior review, have covered the multiverse in various forms. As for fictional realism its a branch concept that is simple "If there is more than one universe, then there should be a universe, where fictional characters exist in the flesh."  However as mentioned before I am neutral.

17. What was your favorite article so far?
The Zelda Series,  I grew up with it and can't wait for the next one so I can defiction that too.

18. Are you out of your mind?
I can assure you I am quite sane.  Just extremely passionate on making the unreal, real.

19.What do you plan to do once this takes its course?
Unlike MissingNo I have no One goal in mind.  I got dozens of ideas I want to express. However as for what? Stay tuned and find out.

20.  What are your sources for images and research?
Aside from what is mentioned in the article, I get most of my research and images from various wikis. Except the comics and the bumper sticker I did that myself....ya I am a pretty crappy artist and i'm F***ING PROUD OF IT!!!! HA!!

21.  What do you have planned for your next article?
Stay tuned and find out.

Now if there are any actual questions you want to ask post them in the comments below.   

An Ode To Memes

Just for kicks I am gonna give meme-ing a try. However for some reason I can't think of one.  Frankly, I don't give a damn, because there are so many to choose from.  If I have to jump every shark, nuke every fridge and fry every coke, then by god I'll do it. You can't handle the truth of it all because this is madness. This is Sparta nah forget it it's Chinatown. Besides I can't just take all the potato chips in the world AND EAT IT!!!  If I had to it would require counting and lord knows that would be over 9000.  Where's the Goddamn Batman when you need him? Maybe he can tell Zod to Kneel before Me or I'll kill him to death!!! Because I am a man who will leave the gun and take the Canolis.  Who is gonna stop me when I lay my vengeance upon thee?  This is my boomstick, there are many like it but this one is mine, because when you put your hand through a bunch of goo that moments ago was Jello, there's always room for Jello.  While you were learning how to spell your name, I was trained to find a stranger in the alps, because shampoo is better. It's all there black and white, clear as crystal, you can't stop eating my sesame cake!!! Now all I got are these lemons, I don't want your damn lemons what am I supposed to do with these!? Choke on 'em!! The power of Christ compels you to phone home and call Bueller.  Bueller? Bueller?  Dispatch war rocket Ajax to bring back his body.  I don't care how, but by Grabthar's hammer, never give up, never surrender.  The price is wrong bitch, it's out of order, you're out of order, this whole system is out of order and IT WAS BUILT IN A CAVE WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!!!  There is no spoon, the cake is a lie, there's no more room in hell and the rum's gone. Why's the rum gone? You maniacs you blew it up, damn you!!! You are tearing me apart with all work and no play!!! Fire everything it's a TRAP!!! Game over man game over, the only winning move is not to play. WROOOOOONG!!! I drink your milkshake and it's weird and pissed off.  I fight for the users and hell's coming with me can you dig it!?  You talking to ME!? JUST LIKE THIIIIIISSS!!!!  I am the master of all this mechanical stuff and I love the power glove, it's so bad. It floats to, they all float!!  I can't stop here, this is bat country and they're all gonna laugh at you!!! You need more cowbell, but I'm a blogger not a doctor.  You're in my spot sir and I have reversed the polarity of the neutron flow, but one of these, days one of these days POW right in the kisser. Reisitence is futile for all your base are belong to us.  Hey!! Listen,  you're princess is in another castle and the urge to kill is rising.  That's all I have to say about that, if you'll excuse me I'm going to bed I think I caught the Weegee virus.

The Writer's Paradox

This is a little idea I thought up with in an attempt to screw with the minds of my viewers as well as to see if any self typing robots explode.


I have writer's block and I am writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block,  who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block, who is writing a story about a man with writer's block.

Have fun trying to figure that out.

If you look closely enough you can get sort of a magic eye effect. I see waves, but it could look like something else to others.

My Response to Atop The Fourth Wall: JLA/Titans Technis Imperitive

I couldn't drive you guys any more crazier than I have at how much I love Channel Awesome and their affiliates including Atop The Fourth Wall. But I also do this as a fellow fan of the Titans.  After watching this Particular review I decided to do a little Defictionalization on my own. Linkara and any fellow fans of Teen Titans be it the show or the comic, this one's for you.

If you guys have a printer and special sticker paper to print it on I encourage you to print this out. Even if you don't have a car.

S.T. Filmmaker in: Unfinished Business

Writing that 34th Street In February made me realize that I gotta kill some time till the upcoming spring. So I paid a Father Time a visit.

While I was out I ran into another familiar friend someone I shoulda paid a visit to along time ago.

Rest assured they are alright but they should now think twice before false advertising people sick of the snow.

The Adventures of S.T. Filmmaker #2

Part two of my adventure. I was originally gonna do this once every 25 posts or so but this Joke was too easy to pass up. Click to zoom.

The Stephen King Universe

What to say about King that hasn't been said.  You either love him or hate him. For me I love the hell out of his stories.  The horror, the drama, and the dark humor ones especially.  King has given us a new spin on old legends as well as adding some of his own.  From troubled teens with special powers, to killer cars that are very jealous when their drivers talk to another person, the four-eyed mild-mannered Maine man from hell has and always will scare the living daylights out of us. He is a firm believer of one simple strategy "Write what you know." Which has been imitated a lot, through parodies that even he himself takes part in.  Best of all he also values expression and will let anyone with a camera film a movie based on his short stories in exchange for $1.  Speaking of adaptations he cameos in almost every single one and even had a minor role.  I often came up with a little conspiracy theory that if he ever showed up in one of his own adaptions, anyone near him would die horribly. Bonus points whenever someone near him tells him off.  For this portion of Could It Exist In Real Life since it's now my 25th post. I am gonna do a defiction tribute to the King of Horror stories.

Since I already covered some of the classic monsters which you can no doubt see in my other analysis. I shall cover some of the elements that King himself is more well known for.

First is Carrie.  We know the story, a socially awkward teenager discovers that she has Telekinesis, the ability to move objects with her mind.  With a combination of peer pressure from an atoning teen/her boyfriend, her bible crazy abusive mother, and dozens of evil teens constantly picking on her. Its a wonder she doesn't explode right?  Well she kinda did, as the result of a prank to get even with her for getting her in trouble for picking on her to begin with. (A vicious cycle.)  Local Alpha Bitch, Chris Hargensen dumps a bucket of pigs blood on Carrie, which jumpstarts the prom night of hell. Nice job Chris, hurt the already unstable girl at the height of her final happiness no way she'll get even.  There's no way that a girl like Carrie can exist right?  Wrong see there are two schools of thought on the matter.  The first and obvious is whether or not telekinesis is a real thing, while I have no video proof of it since most of it is word of mouth. I can honestly say that is real.  My mother being a prime example.  She was a sweet woman but what she liked to do for fun was scare people.  And one of the things she did to me as part of a scare was close the front door of our house without even touching it.  That door was made of thick steel and hard to move some times so using an ordinary string wouldn't do it. The other doors and windows were closed so it wasn't air circulation and there was no one standing behind it.  However a more practical explanation other than what I saw is a more convincing method. Princeton University has started an orginization called PEAR. the Princeton Engineering Anomolies Research.  This particular orginization studies the effect the human mind has on the physical world and has even made a few discoveries that steer closer to the truth spectrum of the once debatable psychic phenom.  Now the second and most overlooked part of Carrie's existence is the Troubled Teen Gets Even.   I will not give any examples for 3 reasons.  1.  There is too many examples to choose from. 2. Because they are both traumatic on both sides of the coin, one being the family of said troubled teen as well as the families of those that he/she/they got even with as well as those wrongfully struck down in the crossfire.  3. Not all troubled teens go down that road, many actually get to work on trying to be better than those that have wronged them in the past. In fact some of the most famous celebs like Christian Bale and internet reviewers like Spoony have been bullied children and social outcasts. Hell one of my mom's friends was pined after by Sebastian Bach of Skid Row before he got famous.   Once again this is word of mouth.

The Second example of Stephens own is Christine.  We all know this story too, another troubled teen purchases an old beat up 58 Fury.  He repairs it and despite it's outer beauty it is repulsed by the entire town.  And for good reason.  For that car has a mind of its own and she is jealous of anyone, foe, friend, girlfriend or family member that comes between her and her man.  Bullies beat the car to a metal pulp but that doesn't stop her, and she is out for revenge.  Could Christine Exist.  Much like Carrie there are schools of thought on the matter.  The first being the car aspect.  As a car Christine exists in 3 variates. 1. through auto collectors that have an affinity with vintage cars. 2. A recurring theme in cars both vintage and modern is the bond between the car and driver.  This goes from affectionately referring to the car as she rather than it, two being the one to personally clean and maintain their dream machine rather than trust a mechanic. And 3. The supernatural aspect of the car.  There's no way it could exist right? Wrong.  King has on record stated that he based his story off of the famous accident that took the life of actor James Dean. His car nicknamed "Little Bastard" Had often been rumored to be cursed as well as blaming the cause of his death in a more supernatural aspect rather than the practicality of it. I personally believe that it was because it was given such a bad nickname, cars have feelings to you know.

The Third example is Dead Zone.  This one you might remember from the memetic "THE ICE IS GONNA BREAK!!"  If not here's the short end  Johnny Smith (No not the one that falls for Pocahantas.)  gets hit by an 18 wheeler and put in a coma for 5 years. When he awakens he finds his life going to hell. His job his gone, his girl is gone and his legs about useless.  That is until he finds out that he is able to see things that either have happened, or will happen.  There's no way he could exist too right? King based this particular character off Peter Hurkos who claimed he had the gift of Psychometry or in layman's terms the ability to tell the past and future through physical contact of an object or a person.  It has often been debated that Hurkos was using a method known as cold reading, an old fake psychic trick that is designed to get the volunteer to inadvertently give information about his/herself. According to Dr. Andrija Puharich, that is not the case as Hurkos was tested by Puharich and scored a 90% accuracy. On the other hand someone else said he did both? Who you may ask? Why Hurkos himself.  He stated that his ability was like a TV Screen randomly going on and off. At the times it was off he relied on cold reading in order to keep people's support of him going. As for my belief, the only way I would know either way would be to grab a flashlight and a shovel.  I am not even kidding on that for he died June 1 1988.

Last but not least is IT.  A group of kids do battle with a shapeshifting monster that uses their fears against them.  They kill IT but make a promise to return should IT ever come back. Now with all IT can do there is no way IT can exist right?  Well IT does, but not in the way you think.  One of IT's trademarks (aside from being Tim Curry in a clown costume.) is that IT takes on the shape of whatever you fear, be it ghosts, werewolves and other monsters.  These fears exist because you make them exist. For me IT would either take on the form of a swarm of bees or big Dogs than that.  However overtime I managed to fear bees less to the point where when ever one approaches me, I manage to swat it down to submission.  However that doesn't erase my fear all together, for its my fear that drives me to fight back.  As are with major fears like heights or death.  You face IT and the courage takes their power away from IT.  Hence why the Losers Club was able to beat IT no triple entendre intended.

Now normally this is the part where I say "Debate, argue and let me know what I miss." and I still instill that. However as my 25th I am gonna make this my first interactive post. I want you to share any ways other King stories can be defictionalized. Be it from your own personal favorites, to the ones you heard about, to even ones you just looked up on the net. I want you to find any scientific or mystical examples of any book of your choice. There is so much King to look into and so little time. As usual stay tuned for more.

The Adventures of S.T. Filmmaker

As part of a short break I am taking I decided to try my hand at web-comic writing. Hope you find this funny. Click and zoom to read.