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Sunday, 3 February 2013

The Legend of Zelda 2: Adventure of Link

This game is a direct sequel to the first. Link now 16 had just been commemorated for rescuing Zelda and Hyrule was rebuilding itself from the damages Ganon caused. They must have really good contractors since most of the Overworld before this game was hollowed out trees and now there are towns built all over.  Anyway Link's troubles are not over, first off just after rescuing Zelda, he has to save another Zelda.  Let me explain.

The Zelda that had been rescued in the first game was merely a decedent of long line of women with similar names. The reason being was that the first Zelda was being violently interrogated by her brother and a wizard years before the first game. He wanted to know where the Triforce of Courage was and she simply refused to say. So the Wizard put her to sleep. The brother, feeling guilty about the whole thing, kept her safe in a chamber and from that day forward named every girl in the royal family after her to honor her.  Impa, Zelda's advisor and bodyguard tasked Link with the job to restore her using the Full Power of the Triforce to bring her back. Since Link had the Triforce of Power and Wisdom already from kicking Ganon's ass earlier, he thought it would be a piece of cake. Wrong, for to make matters worse, Ganon's evil spirit lingers on to influence monsters and some of his still loyal minions want to restore him using Link's blood. The game at the time was unique in many ways. For one it introduced the Magic Meter which was used in future games. Two, it was the first and only Side Scrolling Zelda game. Three, it gave us the crutial possibility of more than one Zelda. Four, it also introduced Dark Link an evil entity that became Link's equal in Battle. Last, it was also one of the rare times a Protagonist was able to harness the full power of the Triforce.

Now most of the items such as the Magic Sword and the like are mentioned in my last entry so this one would be a lot shorter. However unlike the last game there is a lot of new items to.

The first one is the boots. These particular boots allow the wearer to float on certain bodies of  water.  Could these exist in real life? Yes and no. Understand that there is no shoe or boot in the world that can help you float or walk on water, despite what youtube tries to get you to believe. The shoe alone could float. but the mass of the person wearing it could cause it to sink.However there are alternatives.  Ice Skates are often used to skate on Ice, which is frozen water, but that depends on how solid the ice is. However if something as heavy as a snowmobile could run across the ice, then so could skates at the right speed. Should they find away to walk on water there would be one Con. Someone would mistake you for Jesus and as God...excuse me, Morgan Freeman said "Believe me, you wouldn't want that kind of attention."

The second new item is the newly introduced, Magic Jar. This started a long tradition among Zelda games to include a magic Meter, so Link could use spells and energy projectiles. Could this exist? Yes, see theoretically Magic is a concept in which unbelievable things can be achieved depending on the energy of it's user. In other words the more energy you have, the greater the power. However when people think energy boosters they think energy drinks like Red Bull, Rockstar , Mountain Dew and the like. However that is not true. "Energy Drinks" contain synthetic Caffiene.and sugars which speed up the heart keeping the drinker awake. But eventually due to stress and constant use the drinker will eventually crash.  So what are the real energy potions you ask?  According to Live Strong, various vitamins enriched juices, natural caffeine drinks, like coffee's and teas.  There are some teas that are believed to help boost Chakras a concept that believes that certain parts of the human body have spiritual abilities. Myself, I drink Green Tea, it's full of antioxidants that that increase the bloodflow and the correct amount of natural Caffeine.  And best of all it, like magic potion is green too.

The third new Item is the Power Glove. This item allows Link's sword to cause more damage. An upgrade to the last game's Power Bracelet. Could this exist. Definately yes, but not in the way you think.  Unlike the Bracelet, which the magnetic concept was used; the glove works a different way. Throughout history Gloves and Gauntlets served a certain purpose, from keeping your hands warm, to protecting them from dangerous items.  In this case it allows Link to better grip his sword when he fights his enemies. These kind of gloves are most common in the Gym worn by weightlifters to better grip the weights they were lifting.

Now another concept always bothered me. Zelda, the one that was sleeping was put in a deep sleep for years. Yet she never aged, or died of starvation and dehydration. Lastly when she wakes up she never suffered from atrophy.   You could argue that it's magic, but until now I was thinking of the scientific aspect of the matter. When a person sleeps their metabolism increases, burning the nutrients in your body to keep your energy up for the eventual waking. In order to keep a comatose person alive you need to keep their body at the nutritional level and at the time this game took place I doubt I.V.s have been invented.  However if one were to slow down the metabolism, it would slow down the energy intake and increase the life expectancy but slowing it down to the capacity required for Zelda to be alive is astronomical. Not impossible, but hard to do. Then there's the age factor, she never ages and is the same age when she wakes that she was when she slept. In order for that to be possible would be if she was frozen cryogenically. Which could be possible, but you'd have to believe in magic in that case since the technology for Cryogenics was also not invention. The pro is she would be she would survive, but the con is that that kiss she gave Link probably lowers his magic meter if you know what I mean. (Obscure Reference for the win.)

Of course as usual let me know if I missed anything and stay tuned for Link to the Past.

Oh just an update. The women that heal Link's health and magic meters, they are hookers. I know this, Zelda fans know this, and Shigeru Miyamoto knows this. Atari may have made the first videogame porn, but Nintendo did the first prostitution in gaming history. Suck on that Atari and San Andreas.

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